We Are Who We Are By The Choices We Make In Life...

There are so many people out there who whine and complain about the fact that “life screwed them over” or “life wasn’t fair” or “other people screwed them out of what they wanted”. I know. I used to be one of them. If you are complaining about someone and how they behave, my question to you now is: “If you are so dead-set against this person then why are you still associating with them? It is your choice to have this relationship (whether it be as a friendship or as a lover) with this person.” It is YOUR choice to have a better life.

I’ve come to one harsh realization. “We are who we are because of the choices we make in life, not by circumstances beyond our control. We are where we are because of those same choices.”

You may say “Well…what if it was a weather phenomenon that destroyed our home and now we’re homeless.” The same holds true. You may not be able to control the tornado or hurricane that destroyed your house, but what are you going to do with your lives since the tornado or hurricane spared that? Everything beyond the storm is your own choice in life.

Life does not play favorites. It plays with a level playing field. What influences the results is the caliber of player you are. Are you a star or are you going to permanently play in the minor leagues. The true stars in life are the ones who take what skills are given them and go with what they have. They don’t complain; they just do.

I have been given a limited set of skills; (a talent for photography and the ability to self-teach myself that skill; (the limiters) a case of dyslexia (undiagnosed until adulthood) and dyscalculia). But the potential for making a successful life are built into those limited set of skills. I have two choices: I can sit there and whine that I need better skills, that the limitations in my life prevent me from getting the diploma that I need; that life threw me a haymaker and didn’t give me the right tools for the life I wanted or I can make use of those skills that were given to me, develop them to their fullest extent and then use them to make a life for myself. The latter is what I am choosing to do.

In life you are given opportunities; they may be easy to see or they may be disguised. It is your choice to seek them out and use those opportunities. If you choose not to seek out those opportunities, then you are where you are becase of those choices you made.

They say in physics: that in order for an object to be moved from its course, a force equal to or greater must be applied to that object in the direction in which it is supposed to change direction to. That is the same with human nature. Do you as someone who doesn’t complain spend time with someone who does complain? That’s akin to negotiating with a train which is bearing down on you. He/she is set in his tracks and nothing you say or do is going to help him. If you stay where you are, you will get run over. The only thing that will change his direction or stop his self-destructive momentum is going to be a wall or a life-changing event.

We are given a limited time to do what we were meant to do in life. We cannot be brought down by the complainers and whiners in life to their level. We just don’t have that time. If we want to achieve what we were meant to do, we have to make the best possible use of our time given to us. Acknowledge that they are there and tell them “I’m sorry you are in this state, but unfortunately there is nothing that I can say or do that will make your situation any better. Any change that you must do must come from you.” And then do what you have to do for yourself.

Make life work for you!